The Perks Of Not Being A Wallflower

Stand out in the crowd and the world will walk with you!

 
The Perks Of Not Being A Wallflower

Everybody dreams of the spotlight but ever wonder why so many go dumbstruck when it actually falls on them? It is because we are used to being just a face in the crowd. While growing up, society ingrains it into our mind, which going with the flow is the best option, not against it. We are taught to despise resistance, to seek the comfort that there is in fitting in. But there are still few, who cannot be contained no matter what; some free souls that just deny complacency and decide their own journey. Labels like “rebel” and “freak” come in handy to make them frowned upon by the general consensus. But they still rise like the waves.

Mentors like Nikumbh in Taare Zameen Par can break the stereotypes
Mentors like Nikumbh in Taare Zameen Par can break the stereotypes

Image Credit: Movie – Taare Zameen Par

Sure, there are lots of perks in blending in, in being the wallflower. As much as we bust our lungs singing along to “Sadda Haq”, the truth is, society’s scorn can be pretty intense and as a social being, human beings are obviously scared of losing their social approval. Every child that does not fit in with the rest of classmates is not lucky enough to have a kind and understanding mentor like Nikumbh (Aamir Khan in Taare Zameen Par). Mostly, what they deal with is more like a Viru Shahastra Buddhay (Boman Irani in 3 Idiots). Hence, some Ishan Avasthi-s sadly grow up to become Joy Lobo.

Living out of the box can invite harsh social exclusion, but makes you happy in the end
Living out of the box can invite harsh social exclusion, but makes you happy in the end

Image Credit: Movie – Tamasha

But what if we flip the coin and shift the perspective a bit? How long can one actually stay suppressing their true selves just to fit the mould? We all know that is what Ved, in Imtiaz Ali’s Tamasha, tried to do as well. But after all, in the end, all his make-believe world of “normal” had to come crashing down. Living out of the box can invite harsh social exclusion but at one point people learn to get over it.

Real people have lived those realities and survived to not only tell but write their own stories. An unmarried, pregnant Nina Gupta back in the 90s India was literally on her way to social suicide when she decided to give birth to her daughter Masaba. A conservative society like ours could not have been too kind to them. But look where she is today. Not only is Nina herself a celebrated and busy actress till date, but Masaba Gupta has also become a name to reckon with in the world of global fashion.

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Umber Ghauri macht Kunst. Make Up Kunst. Und das ist politisch. Denn Umbers Models sind LGBTQ+, POC oder Menschen mit Behinderungen. 💄 “Schwarze Trans*Menschen, Frauen mit viel Körperhaar, die alles verkörpern, was nicht konform zu der Vorstellung von weißer Schönheit ist, werden bei mir gefeiert statt verdeckt.” Umber verziert Körper, die in vielen Gesellschaften als “hässlich und somit nicht liebenswürdig” gelten. “Und genau das verändere ich. Ich helfe ihnen, sich geliebt zu fühlen und ermutige sie, sich selbst zu lieben.” 💄 Armeghan Taheri von @afghanpunk hat mit @umberghauri über westliche Schönheitsideale, Selbstliebe und die Kraft von Make-Up gesprochen. Das englischsprachige Interview "The Aesthetics of Love" findet ihr auf unserem migrationspolitischen Portal "Heimatkunde". Link in der Bio. . 📷 : @eivindhansen / Model: Alok Vaid-Menon . #allbodiesarebeautiful #bodydiversity #decolonizebeautystandarts #alokvaidmenon #queermakeup #queerfashion #queerbeauty #representationmatters #lgbt #lgbti #lgbtiq #makeup #makeupartist

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Born as an Indian male, living as an openly trans person was not really a cake walk for Alok Vaid Menon either. Not only the stigma of his own culture, but the abusive words and behaviors of random passersby on the streets of so-called developed countries surely must have had taken its own share of toll on him. But he turned the table around so hard that instead of suppressing his voice, he became the mouthpiece of an entire marginalized community through his poems and frequent anecdotal posts on his social media.

The bottom line is, standing out from the crowd is hard. But if you stand firm enough, there is nothing that can stop your flight afterward. And the happiness and pride you would feel then, would be priceless!